Tuesday, 2 October 2012

Pitch workshop #5: Stacy Stokes


Stacy Stokes
Where the Staircase Ends
YA Supernatural Mystery

Taylor wishes she could disappear after her reputation is destroyed at the hands of her best friend. But when her wish comes true, instead of an angel-filled afterlife she must climb a seemingly endless staircase into the sky; a journey that unravels the mystery behind her best friend’s betrayal and the life Taylor thought she wanted to leave behind.

Kat’s critique:

Taylor wishes she could disappear after her reputation is destroyed by at the hands of her best friend. But when her wish comes true, instead of an angel-filled afterlife, she must climb a seemingly endless staircase into the sky. Her a journey that unravels the mystery behind her best friend’s betrayal, and the life Taylor thought she wanted to leave behind.

I think this is a good pitch. The only thing I’d like to know is what decision/conflict does Taylor face? Your ending could be re-worded to give a stronger indication of this, I think.

Please feel free to add your own constructive comments below!


4 comments:

  1. Thanks, Kat! Great thoughts, and you're dead on about the conflict in the last sentence. I'll give some thought to how I can punch that element up in the last sentence. Thanks for your help!

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    Replies
    1. You're very welcome! Hope to see your entry in Hook, Line & Sinker :)

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  2. I think this is really strong. I wouldn't change a thing. Grat job!

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  3. Ooh, I love this idea! Very intriguing. Think the crit was right on, and if you make that conflict clearer, I think this will be fantastic! Nice job!

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