Thursday, 4 October 2012

Pitch workshop #15: Laurie Litwin


Laurie Litwin
Lilly Washington’s Presidential Adventure
MG Contemporary (adventure)

When twelve-year-old Lilly Washington finds a mysterious diary with entries from the 1870s, she embarks on a wild adventure to find an undiscovered time capsule. What she finds could change history as we know it. That is, if she isn’t expelled first.

Kat’s critique:

When twelve-year-old Lilly Washington finds a mysterious diary with entries from the 1870s, she embarks on a wild adventure to find an undiscovered time capsule. What she finds could change history (all of history? Or could you give an indication of what specifically may change?) as we know it. That is, if she isn’t expelled first.

First of all, I love your title. And you have great voice in the pitch, too. Not much I can add here!

Please feel free to add your own constructive comments below!


1 comment:

  1. I love this! IT sounds like a fun read and one my little girl would enjoy!

    Just a few questions that might help you make a marvelous pitch even better!

    1.) Where did she find the diary? Was it in her house? the library? an old trunk at a garage sale?

    2.) What history did it change?

    3.) Just a thought, but you might want to mention the trouble she's having with teachers/principal that would get her expelled.

    Great pitch and sounds like a super story?

    ReplyDelete

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