Wednesday, 3 October 2012

Pitch workshop #11: Alexander Pierce

Alexander Pierce
YA Fantasy / Mystery / Thriller

Someone's killing Lenmar's most powerful noblewomen.  Flynn, a young and talented thief, is the prime suspect.  He's also the best chance Asher, the Captain of the Queen's guard, has to find the killer.  He just has to convince her. To do that, he needs to pull one last high-stakes job.

Kat’s critique:

Someone's killing Lenmar's most powerful noblewomen.  Flynn, a young and talented thief, is the prime suspect.  He's also the best chance Asher, (I’ve taken this out so it doesn’t break up your sentence) the Captain of the Queen's guard has to find the real killer.  He just has to convince her. To do that, he needs to pull one last high-stakes job.

This is a really strong pitch – there was very little I could see that might make it better!

Just one little side-note: be wary of being too vague with your genre classification. It may have elements of fantasy, mystery and thriller, but not being specific can make it look like you’re not confident where it sits.

Please feel free to add your own constructive comments below!

2 comments:

  1. Great pitch! Best of luck with it!

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  2. Thanks Kat! You've made my week!

    I do understand your point about the genre classification, I AM a bit uncertain where it fits right now. I'm only about 1/5 of the way through my first full revision and the entire third act is getting rewritten. When I'm a little further through I'll be more comfortable dropping the Thriller or Mystery label depending on which way the pendulum feels like it's swung.

    Again, Thank you!

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